The Heelers Diaries

the fantasy world of ireland's greatest living poet

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Location: Kilcullen (Phone 087 7790766), County Kildare, Ireland

Friday, October 19, 2007

iranian for beginners

President Ahmad Ahmadinejad: "We will wipe Israel off the map."

Translation: I am a psychotic murdering scum and the United Nations is utterly useless except for protecting the rights of psychotic murdering scum like me.

President Ahmad Ahmadinejad: "No one will dare to attack us."

Translation: "I have a secret memorandum of understanding with Putin's Russia that he will not permit anyone to attack us."

President Ahmad Ahmadinejad: "Even the United States would not dare to attack us. We would welcome an attack by the United States. We would destroy them totally."

Translation: "I have suit case nuclear weapons that I obtained years ago from elements within Russia. They are positioned in several western cities. I intend to use them eventually regardless of what you do. But even a monster likes to pretend he has an excuse for the mass murders he commits."

4 Comments:

Blogger Genevieve Netz said...

James, I think you're quite right about #1 and #2 and I really hope you're not right about #3, but you probably are.

11:27 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Heelers.
My name is Ahmed, AhmEd, AHMED.
For crying out loud.
His Excellency President Ahmed Ahmadinejad.

9:27 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Heelz.
Whatever happened to all your old stuff about us learning from the Muslims in terms of prayer and respect for women?
Have you recanted?
Long Term Fan

2:20 AM  
Blogger heelers said...

You got me Long Term.
Right in the gizzard.
James

2:22 AM  

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